i have a new blog that i will be updating in from now on.

liveanewday.blogspot.com

go check it out please.

james and i broke up.
like 3 days ago.
it was very mutual. and not much of a big scene at all. it felt like the passion behind our love was just gone. a sense of bordem, stale, not much excitement. which shouldn't be the case when im 19, he's 21, and we've been together only 8 months. i still love him very much. and always will. we still talk every day. when i see him we hug and chat. it's still weird. it's hard. i miss him. im glad we can still be best friends. and have eachother in our lives. i would just hate to drag our relationship out and us hate eachother in 6 months. as apposed to ending it now and at least being friends.
if anything we had a lot of fun together. we had a lot of love and a lot of laughs. he's very much a huge part of who i am today. and i've learned a lot about myself, and about life.
we started dating only one month after me being in Orlando. so maybe it is a good time to move on. start a new chapter.

This was my first chane to vote for the president of the united states of america. not only was that a cool feeling. but im filled with a sense of pride, and contentment that the one i voted for won. it's so cool to be living in history. an afican american is in office. i made a difference. im so excited. im sad that amendment 2 passed in FL. i feel very much like a second hand citizen right now. i feel outcasted...and that's something that is bothering me alot. but i wont loose hope and i wont give up. i will remember today for the rest of my life. i thank everyone for going out and voting. for supporting issues and making your voice heard.

things have been the same for the most part. still having troubles adjusting to the real world. being so far away from my family and all of my friends. work is great. Highschool Musical 2 closed this past weekend. sad face. But Highschool Musical 3 will be going into rehearsals in like 2 weeks, so that should be fun. supposed to be an amazing show. James and i are great. we went to a wedding this past weekend and i ended up catching to bouquet. and he caught the garder. lol it was super random and super cute and super made me happy. he's kind of amazing in every way.
the only thing that's been getting me down is stress. stressed about money. stressed about so many things that i know everyone goes through in life. i prob need to get another job. but finding a place that allows me to work with my avaibality with Disney is hard because my hours at Disney arent always the same. i miss Charlotte. i cant wait to go home and visit.

i love james.
he gets me through everyday.
and everything.

so i have some thinking to do. and its a decision that may be really smart on my half, or really dumb. and im getting both sides of opinions from people. im unhappy with my living situation. and have been for a few months. not that i have bad roomates and in comparison to others, it's really not that bad. however i often feel like a mother tending to her children. and i dont enjoy being in my apartment that i pay good money for every month. i never want to be there, let alone have friends or my boyfriend over. and that bothers me. i've spent a lot of time and money trying my best to make it a home. i feel like my roomates think of our place as just a sleeping ground. hardly are there...yet leave huge messes. disrespect my furniture. and are constantly late paying bills. which in turn effects my relationship with my landlord. who happens to love me. i have been wanting to leave for some time. i have a possible place i could very well go. now my question is...do i stick it out and just wait to Jan/Feb when my lease is up then go from there....or do i bail. and give up? i feel like i should be trying more...but it gets extremly frustrating.

things are as usual. im finding a normal routine to this place. which i thought would never happen with how random my first few months were. i cant believe 6 months have past already. work is same as usual. i love getting to dance to highschool musical. it's the greatest thing ever. and i really hope that i get to learn HSM3. the friends i have down here are incredible. i truly love them. i can be exactly who i am around them, something i only felt comfortable doing with a select few back at Northwest.
i do miss home. i miss the strong relationships i had. it's crazy. were all growing up. were moving on into the real world. doing what we want, making our dreams come true as much as we can. i look back a year ago, and am amazed how much one person can accomplish in one year. my entire life has changed. and i know im not the only one. i personally love it here. i miss people. but i think that's the only thing i would change. jew, black....i miss you.

James is...perfect for me...to say the least.
he's amazing. for our 4 month anniversary he suprised me and we showed up to the House of Blues to see Idina Menzel...out of control amazing. i cried. and yes she sang defying gravity. a life moment i'll never forget. i honestly couldnt have asked for anything better than him. he's what i've imagined, and the things i didnt know i needed. he supports any decision i have. completly gets me for the crazy, some times out of control person that i am. i love him. with every meaning of the words. im anxious for the next transition in our relationship. scared for it..but more excited. we just clicked so well, i cant believe how blessed i am to have him in my life.

i cant help but think of what i want next. after disney...which i know isnt any time in the near near future. i want to stay for about 2 or 3 years. but then what? i know i want to go back to school. but where? i dont think i want to go back to NC. FL? maybe. i dont want to live here forever though. no more than i have to...the heat is the worst. scary to think about stuff like that but i know it's neccesary. ugh...i miss venting to lj.

hope college and real world and what not is treating everyone well. i thnk about alot of people, alot of the time. and miss you guys terribly. hope to talk to you soon.

things have been...well they've been.
work has been still work.
amazing as usual. but work none the less.
the boyfriend...is still so amazing to me everyday. we fight naturally. as everyone does. nothing to big. mainly stupid stuff. we spend buckets of time together...he doesnt seem to mind it. i sure dont. i'd safely say were in love. were in it for the right reasons. and i get a feeling he'll be in it with me for a while. his birthday is coming up on the 12th...shortly after mine on the 3rd *cough cough*...so that's exciting. i have my insecurities. my paranoias... but i dont think i really have much to worry about. whatever happens happens i suppose. but i do know that him in my life the way he is right now is the most amazing thing i've ever experienced. and everyday i look into his eyes i can say i love him more than the last. im a hard bitch to handle and he puts up with me. most of the time. he's not the easiest piece of pie either...but that's part of the fun of it all. if only he truly knew the way i do how much he means to me and how much i'd do for him. but anyway enough about all that love stuff.

life's been pretty good to me. i've had my ups and downs the past few weeks. but im strong and hanging in there the best i know how. Rebecca came to see me last week...and that was simply amazing. highly needed in several ways. im a little home sick. miss my friends from home. esp now that most of them are back in Charlotte for the summer. i wish i could be there. i miss my brothers. my cousions...that whole lot of people. but i've found my niche here. for now at least. and it feels right. the people i've met. and the friends that i've made...its where im supposed to be at this moment. and that's comforting to know. i make magic. what more could i ask for?

a Happy Early Birthday to me.
and James.
and to all those lucky ones who celebrate the day about THEM in July.
xoxo

im learning Highschool Musical 2 as of next week.
oh
my
fucking
god.

really? this is amazing. im so happy. i cant believe i'll be getting paid to dance to HSM...in disney. being gay and happy. and im like ooops...just another day in the office. i love it.

things in wonderland are amazing.
boy is good.
roomates are good
work is good.
life is
good.

im happy.
and in love.
dreams do come true.

im sorry that i hardly update.
but i hardly know where to start.

Block Party overnight are tonight. which im excited about. it's been one long month. of jump roping and tramping, and dancing my ass off. and it starts to where on your body. which is why my left knee is like fucking up. but whatev.

things are great with James...like great. great. i love him. lots and lots. he is perfect for me right now. i honestly can say that i have never been happier in my life. i cant wait to take him home and introduce him to everybody. i guess it's true you really can find youre prince charming at Disney World. ♥
we had our lil one month this past friday. but it's felt like a looooot longer. in a good way of course. and that little mr.bought me a coach purse as an anniversy present. and i about died. i love him.

things with the roomates are fine. Caroline and I are like to peas in a pot. we are loud and funny and glittery and gay together. and it's perfection. i love it.

still miss home. have random flashes of highschool and my friends etc....but i look at where i am and im very proud of myself. i really am. im doing something i love. and im truly happy.

i realize that i dont update nearly enough with good long detailed entries. but i dont always feel like it, and do have to watch what i put out there on the internet...cause well...disney is a bigger worse more expensive version of northwest. (kinda)

i started rehersals for Block Party Bash yesterday. which is our new parade at Hollywood Studios that we just got from DisneyLand California like 3 weeks ago. (youtube it) it's intense. like major intense. today i jump roped for 5 hours. outside. im sunburnt. sore. and loving every second of it. cause as much pain as im in...i get to do a new parade that alot of people arent lucky enough to do. so yea it's intense...and my body has never worked this hard and is taking a big beating from it. it'll get easier. and i absolutely love it to bits. tomorrow my track gets to start working on the trampolines (with the jump rope mind you) ugh northwest forgot training in how to be athletic and such. yea this 'parade' is some heavy shit. good thing is im toning my body alot...and getting tan...so ima be one sexy mutha. today really hit us all... the three of us (Caroline (my room mate) and my friend Jeremey) got home from rehersal and we all just paaaaaaassed out. they're still wiped out now. but im going to go chill out and watch a movie with my boyfriend. :)

i can honestly say that i've never been happier in my life. yes there is drama. yes i miss home and people there etc. (which is the hardest part of this). but im out on my own...and working for Disney. no im not hardcore dancing everyday, which i knew i wouldnt be. yes some shifts are a pain in the ass esp ones that include friends with eeyore. but that's part of it. this will be wonderful on my resume..im making wonderful friends that i know i'll know for a lifetime. and i love it to death. i feel so alive and so like me everyday i wake up and have to go to work. and lets touch on that for a sec....the fact that for the next month i get paid to jump rope! wild. crazy wild. i freaking love it. and for every bad day that i have there are 127 great ones.

i know im a bastard for not updating that often. but between internet not working all the time and my ancient ass computer im not always able to get online. and plus i've never been worked this much in my entire life. and i freakin love it. im having the time of my life. having a blast. hanging out with friends...meeting people that i simply amazing to me. and compliment me and my life style so much. it's def. ment to be.

and i've been kind of seeing this guy.
i think it's safe to say dating...
and its so different.
and good.
but different.
his name is James.

im going to be trained in the next cast of Block Party.
and that's a big deal.
and im so excited that i peeed a little when i found out.

im excited for easter.
im wearing pink.

dear thunderstorms that occur every single night this week...
i love you.

dear sunshine...
thank you for shinning on my daily and making the day such a grander thing

dear disney...
im sore. and tired. because of you. but i thank you for allowing me to help you make magic everday.

dear boys...
you honestly have no clue what your missing out on. and i kind of hate you for it. yet youre still fun to look at.

dear 2nd roommate...
i want to help you with your issues. but your so dumb that i cant stand talking to you for more than 5 minutes without my IQ dropping.

dear money...
i dont have a lot of you. and for that reason. i hate you.

dear rosie...
get here now.

dear music...
you make life worth living.

dear livejournal...
i've missed you.



signed,
devin

things have been going a million miles a minute here.
which i expected. and i love it.
i've been training, and rehersing for a lot of different things. having a blast. and trying my best to have as much fun as possible with it all.
i've been meeting a lot of fantastically fabulous people.
and having the greatest time of my life.
everyday is another adventure. and another chance for me to stop and realize that i'm living my dream.
but i miss so many people.

more on my days in Wonderland.
i had my very first 'friend' on sunday.
i was friends with Prince John from Robin Hood.
it was such an amazing experience.
i have alot more friends coming up this week.
including Geppetto....so cant wait for that.
then Friday at 2:44 i make my Disney Debut...i will be a prince in the Enchanted parade. and i can not wait.
things are adjusting well i susppose. still havent really met anyone...so i get lonely from time to time. mainly when Caroline is at work...and im not. haha.
but it's been a blast. i really truly love it here.
Meredith comes in the sunday...then a bunch of other people are coming to visit for their spring break...so March should be fun filled. and highly needed.

it's so wild that i can do things like this that i did last night
Caroline and i left the house around 7:40 heading towards Hollywood Studios
went to the 8:30 showing of Fantasmic.
dead center.
i cried.
went on tower of terror 3 times...no wait.
went on rockin rollercoaster 2 times...no wait.
cost = 0 dollars
a m a z i n g
truly.
ugh. i love love love love love it.

omg omg omg
it's 6:41 in the morning. im watching the sun rise from my bedroom
and i just got home from work.
im tired.
im sore.
i smell bad.
and im starving.
but im on cloud 9.
cause as i was driving home i realized that i just danced through the Magic Kingdom all through the night. in one of my turns i looked up and saw Cinderella's Castle. my heart just melt. then i was off count and i had to concentrate. but besdieds that...i remember coming to Disney when i was 4 years old and going on Splash Mountain and seeing Ariel...and being so mezmorized by it. now i am it. i stiiiiiil cant wrap my head aroudn that. and if it gets annoying...well oh well. because this is amazing. that i am getting money to dress as a prince and dance around with a beautiful girl through in Disney all day.
but gooood lord is it hot as balls.
i love my life right now.
i neeeeeed to sleep.

this adventure is beyond words.
indescribeable. everything is different and more than i thought it would be.
im living. on my own. the way i want to be. the way i want to live.
i am showing the world that i can do what i want to do.
and nothing can stand in my way.
this is part of my dream.
and big step in the right direction...and i made it happen. im living part of my dream.
in reality i'm doing what i've wanted to do for years.
and im so proud of myself.
this has been the greatest decision i've made for myself.

i miss alot of people at home.
i've gotten a little 'people sick'...not so much 'home sick'
i've been having a total blast with my roommate Caroline. we dont do anything...and we end up laughing into wee hours of the morning. were really similar. kinda bitchy when it's funny. but totally nice and polite...etc. i helped hang up her clothes...and i live with fucking barbie. and im ken. it's wonderful.

work as been so intense. i have rehersal tonight from midnight til 6 am. and as hellish as that sounds...im totally stoked about it. i can hardly wait. i get to dance around Main Street USA all night. to Enchanted. im waiting to wake up...because this just cant be real. but it is.
all the depression that i went through this past year after graduation. all the loneliness. all the miserable days of just working and not having any type of performance in my life....was so worth it to be able to be doing what im doing right now. it allows me to appericate it more. i cant wait to see where this takes me in my future. cause i know it's going to open many great doors. and all that doubted me can kiss it. cause im here. living and breathing my dream. and from this point on in my life...i will continually do what i want to do. and be all that i want to be. no limits. over the rainbow.

good lord it's been forever since i have updated. and since last entry...my entire life has changed as i knew it. and i love it sooo much. 
i'll start off by mentioning that i was really stressed out and that in turn made me extremly ill my last week in NC. and during my move. and my first few days here i was still really sick. and felt like hell warmed up. and was not to happy about being in a town where i knew noone...doing nothing cause i hadnt starting training yet. but all's well.and im better then ever now. 

i started my training (which is a five day process) but i was only able to do day 1 and2 this week cause i was already pulled for rehersal (which i start tomorrow). so Thursday i went to my Traditions and Welcome class. which was long and fun...but kinda borning. just like at any other job they went over all the safety blah blah blah boring stuff. Friday was my day one of training. to be a character (big fur costumes) and did day 2 on saturday. it's been fun. long days. heavy costumes that are hot. but in all really fun. i've learned soo much about Disney already it's crazy how much has to go into this company for it to function. just from the entertainment stand point cause that's all i've been learning about. then this morning i had my parade orientaion. which is walking about the park early ass morning before guestes are there to get a feel for the parade route, learning the ins and outs of it as well. then all this week i'll be in rehersal for the Enchanted parade. which is a specail event parade for the release of the Enchanged dvd. so super stoked about that. still havent really met anyone yet. my one roommate did move in on friday so it's nice not being totally alone. but still kinda dont know anyone. so even though it's like 2 and iv'e been done with my day for a lil bit now. i still have nothing to do, and no one to hang out with. but i know that'll get better. i cant believe i've been getting paid to have the fun that i've been having. this is beyond words amazing. and is a true dream come true for me.

my room is a master disaster area.
because there is stuff. and boxes everywhere.
that's because im moving.
to orlando.
to work for Disney.
yeah still hasnt hit me yet.

seriously if it werent for people like aunt janet, rebecca,mo, mom, mamma r, and many others....helping me with support and wise words of wisdom and what not. i'd  be a complete mess. granted i am. my face is broken out to the max (really cute right?), and im just a tad bit insane. but i feel id be alot worse without them. ugh im so blessed. for realzzzz

i've got a pocket, got a pocket full of sunshine.
:D

 with everything that i have to do...im already begining to get frazzled. i mean the list of things to do goes on and on. and two weeks seemed like a long time when i accepted the job. but my god....it's like no time at all. 
and im so excited about it.